I use "she" and "her", particularly in regard to all my intellectual labor (writing, service, art).
I too was raised in a culture that encourages us to doggedly assign specific pronouns to certain physical features. I too built that into my body so it became a reflex. I too have felt the friction of honoring someone's pronouns against what my gut wanted me to say.
That being said, my research for Society after Certainty has led me to be more skeptical of such assuredness, particularly when it runs contrary to the self assertion of another human being. I am now training myself to refer to people as they refer to themselves, not just in gender, but in all directions.
How have labels given you freedom in your life?
How have labels caused you suffering in your life?